"Catchin"means"catch him if I can"， it‘s a project about myself. I explored my personal experience of emotional traumas from childhood and expressed my understanding of intimate relationships. When I was a kid, my father passed away, enhancing my dependence and admiration for my father in my subconsciousness. In my adult life, I also continued to look for intimate relationships with people who are similar to my father, as I couldn't help but try to obtain fatherly love from them. I never succeed. I recorded my feelings and personal memories in my growth into the work, which served as a carrier for the unvented emotions. Through the affective expression and the materialization of abstract emotional elements, I presented my mental journey of "searching for dad."

As a kid, my father could say“I love you” by holding me or carrying me on his shoulder. His warm chest and broad shoulders gave me the safety and peace of mind. Though it has been many years, I still remember those loving actions till today.

A few years later, the frequent quarrels between my parents shattered my father's gentle and tall image in my mind. I tried to bond my parents' broken relationship, and I refused to accept that my father is fading away as my dependence .

When I was 12, my father died unexpectedly. Suddenly, I was flooded by past memories. The fragmented memories are interwoven with time, repeatedly flushing my wound.

When I was 14, my stepfather barely became a façade covering the fact that I didn't have a father. His hypocrisy and indifference separated us like smoke, and I also planted thorns around my heart to protect my real "father".

At the age of 18, I fell in love with a man much older than me, and I projected my ideal image of "perfect father" on him, fabricated gorgeous deformed fantasies, which made me lost in this relationship.

The repeated setbacks in love gradually made me understand that I could never find a "father" again. So I began to accept my past trauma, accept myself, and cultivate a real sense of security from the bottom of my heart.